Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Coming to Nantes

Lelaki Komunis Terakhir screens at this year's Festival of 3 Continents in Nantes, France, which runs from 21-28 November. Now that you asked, the three titular continents are Asia, South America and Africa.

This is the second French screening, after the Marseille International Documentary Festival in July.


Blogger Amir said...

(Note: The paper did not print the 3rd article).

NST. 9 November

by Amir Muhammad


A small group protesting against a conversion taking place at one of our spanking international airports was dispersed in an unruly way yesterday.

This group had received word that chiropractic specialist Kalamiah Mat Dom, 41, was about to convert RM1,000 into Indonesian currency at a BBMB money-changer. These self-declared monetary activists gathered around her while holding aloft placards denouncing her for “selling out Malaysian money” and “buying into foreign interests.”

Kalamiah was shocked by their actions but managed to complete her transaction after shoving away some of the placards obscuring her view. She came away from the counter with 2,494,900 Indonesian rupiah.

A spokesman for the protest group, who spoke on condition of replying via SMS, told this worthy organ: “Imho its x rite for her 2 bcome an Indnesn millionaire overnite! lol” He adds that his group wishes to be known as Citizens Against Currency Impurity (CACI).

He pointed out that it would be most unbecoming for genuine Malaysian citizens to carry around paper notes upon which were printed pictures of Indonesian leaders and icons, as this might lead to a loss of faith regarding our own symbols. He even mulled a return to the barter trade where each person could retain some measure of dignity and national autonomy.

Suspiria Chen of the NGO Hakmu released an infuriated 30-page press statement denouncing the actions of “this small but mindless minority of monetary fanatics.”

She continues: “For centuries, the people of this country have been exposed to international travel and trade. This would require currency to be converted once in a while. We cannot be held hostage by bigots who, under the guise of monetary purity, rob us of our essential freedoms.”

She adds that this is only the latest in a series of undemocratic actions aimed at scaring away locals from obtaining foreign currency. The others include:

• A boisterous protest outside a Jalan Ampang money-changer to discourage garment trader Fergus Boo from getting Thai currency, which used inflammatory slogans such as “Kiss your baht goodbye.”
• A rule to dub all foreign movies which mention outside currency, to the extent that our video shelves are now full of titles such as Clint Eastwood’s A Fistful of Ringgit and For A Few Ringgit More.
• A move to get posters with martial-arts actor Donnie Yen’s name rewritten as Donnie Ringgit, but this was abandoned after it transpired that he is not Japanese.

Kalamiah reveals that her decision to convert her money was the result of deep, careful consideration. “I want to visit Bandung to try the famous drink there, since air Bandung has been in short supply in Malaysia after the fasting month. I was told by friends and relatives that if I were to give the traders there Malaysian currency, they would respond with dismissive statements like ‘Gue ga mau trima. Gila lho!’ That is when I knew I needed to bring rupiah with me instead.”

The authorities dispersed the protest group but some evaded capture by ducking into the nearby Starbucks and McDonalds, where they promptly disguised themselves as harmless consumers of multinational products.

Attempts to flush them out with teargas proved futile when service staff chased the enforcers away for “scaring away the other customers and possibly contaminating the delicious food and drinks.”


A man was detained yesterday, or perhaps the day before, but certainly not earlier than last week.

He was picked up at his office that was in the city, although the precise nature and location of the office and the city were not disclosed.

He was detained to assist police in its investigation of an ongoing crime that everybody seems to know something about, but which you will not read about here.

It is not known whether his crime had anything to do with the fact that he is nameless.

“Is it wrong for a man to have no name?” muses news analyst G Pundeet, who spoke on condition that he not be anonymous. “Is it the same offence as not having a MyKad, or is it more severe?”

Indeed, being nameless is a common factor linking several men and women who had been detained by the Malaysian authorities recently. “This means that namelessness is somehow associated with crime,” continues our named source.

But this does not have to be so! Sometimes, parents are forgetful or negligent when it comes to registering a baby’s name. And sometimes, families can have so many children that they plumb forgot to name the quieter, less attention-grabbing ones. These individuals will grow up blissfully incognito and might be happier for it. For starters, teachers will never call on them to answer tricky questions in class.

There could conceivably exist entire communities of people beyond the reach of our national registration bodies, and are thus legally nameless. But even in such circumstances, individuals within the community are bound to have nicknames for each other. These include ‘He who was born in the shade of the nipah tree’ or “She who was conceived after the live telecast of the Thomas Cup final.”

There are poems and paintings called Untitled so why can’t some people simply be Unnamed?

But back to this nameless man: The public wants to know whether his crime consisted of anything other than his lack of a name.

Further details will be written about here. Or maybe not.


Popular TV sports show Suka-suka Sukan has been suspended indefinitely after complaints were received about its sex-based coverage.

A concerned member of the public, futsal coach Ratna Mutu Manikam, expressed shock that the programme repeatedly stressed upon the sex of each athlete.

“They kept using terms like ‘women’s basketball’ and ‘men’s hockey’” said Ratna in disgust before spitting on the floor. “After all the efforts of enlightened society leaders to do away with sex discrimination, this strikes me as two steps back in orthopedic shoes.”

This individual adds: “I have a 2-year old relative who happens to have a Y chromosome. How can I explain to Cadmus that Cadmus is not allowed to take part in ‘women’s volleyball’? This simply boggles the mind.”

Another outraged viewer is florist-cum-interior designer Ashwan Manjakani. “Gender is just a state of mind,” says this person. “I am embarrassed every time I have to fill out a form which asks for my gender, of all things. I would always tick ‘Lain-lain’ just to confound the expectations of the majority who are still trapped in the false binary mindset.”

This citizen adds: “How are we to break free from our shackles and succeed as one nation if we are still so divided? There’s no such thing as ‘men’s diving’ and ‘women’s diving’. There’s only diving. You either hit the water or you miss.”

A spokesperson for the programme declined comment, and was apparently at home enjoying healthy chips.


11:00 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It is sad that Malaysians do not have the freedom of choice to watch your great works when many other countries are more than welcomed to have your works noticed by their people.

I can only buy your Last Communist T Shirt and not having to watch what the movie is all about .......

11:41 am  
Blogger Amir said...

The current issue of Off The Edge magazine (with Muhyiddin Yassin on the cover) has a 9-page photo-based article by Danny Lim on the making of Apa Khabar Orang Kampung. Check it out yawl.

7:54 pm  
Anonymous piere said...

tu poster mat rempit hong kong ke?

1:58 pm  
Blogger Amir said...

Poster dari filem Taiwan Brave 20 tapi ga pernah nonton.

2:54 pm  

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